“We all lose friends.. we lose them in death, to distance, and over time. But even though they may be lost, hope is not. The key is to keep them in your heart, and when the time is right, you can pick up the friendship right where you left off. Even the lost find their way home when you leave the light on.”
― Amy Marie Walz
There is one thing I fear most, it is losing my friends.
Here’s a little story:
Through elementary school and middle school, I had a really good friend. We were great together. We trusted each other and we relied on each other to survive the chaos that was Middle school. 8th grade was the year when it all kinda ended. I’m not going to go into the nitty-gritty but at the end of the year, we hardly were friends anymore. We had a few fights and suddenly 5 years of friendship had disappeared. Now we go to different high schools and we never talk.
Losing a friend like that sucks. I know that I could have tried to save the friendship. When I look back I can think of so many things I could have done right or changed the way I handled the situations, but it’s been a year since I last talked to him. The thought of losing my friends has bugged me a lot recently. I am in a new school and I am making so many new friends, but at the back of my head, I have a constant fear of the fact that they may leave me one day.
Losing a friend is a very emotional and touchy subject. We all know it sucks. Losing someone who you trust is one of the hardest things to experience. I often struggle to comprehend that it is a natural part of life. I usually start to blame myself for losing my friendships. It’s a rabbit hole. A rather unhealthy one if I do say so myself. There are so many questions that I have about friendships, like, “should I be ok with losing some of them,” or like “do I need to understand that people change.” These questions consume me. I find myself often trying to understand why some friendships survive the test of time and others don’t.
Honestly, I don’t think there is a straightforward answer to that question. Friendships are definitely a bit more complicated than I thought, but I don’t think they have to be. I have learned how to separate true friends from fake friends. I don’t have a rulebook to what makes a good friend. I think it’s just a gut feeling, and it’s definitely not something you can learn in school. You learn through life experiences.
Going back to my story, friends fight and they get mad at each other but, what makes up a good friend is the willingness to forgive. My friend and I never got the chance to forgive each other. I think that was one of the biggest reasons the bond broke. What the experience taught me, like many other experiences, was that life is a roller coaster. You never know what happens next. It is important to try to keep your friends. True friends are hard to find. They are valuable, so that’s why you should always try to stick with them. When you feel lost, which you will eventually in your lifetime, your friends will always be there for you.
So today, perhaps send that message to a friend you haven’t spoken to in a while. Send a photo, or heck, send a voice message (those things are hilarious). Take the initiative because when you do, you won’t regret it.